Family Dinners God is thinking about me and eating me… Tomaz Salamun Saturday nights, we fasted. During Sunday mass, we fidgeted on hard pews, light-headed from low blood sugar, dizzy and suffused with delusions of impending grace. We bargained with the lord, devoutly chanted our unworthiness. With bent heads, we knelt and beat our breasts, offered trembling tongues for a piece of the sacrificed Christ. Family dinners continued the repentance theme. Mom served fried liver with red onions, a hungry child's crown of thorns. Her "eat three bites or sit all night" rule taught me about swallowing without fuss everything I was told. Afterward, I poked a finger down my throat, rejecting God and mother's feast as I obstinately purged.    c2000 by Jennifer Lagier